Chapter Fifty: Green Lamp and Ancient Buddha Enlighten the Perplexed Mind

In a nearby Huairentang medicine shop, a physician in a green robe stood at the threshold and witnessed the scene. He promptly instructed his apprentice to bring Jin Xiaodao inside. Guided into the room, Jin Xiaodao was laid upon a bed. The physician looked at her face, which had been slashed, and her eyes, which had been gouged out. The blood had already been washed away by the rain, but fresh blood continued to seep out.

The physician instructed his apprentice, "Quickly fetch some medicine and stop the bleeding first." Realizing she had encountered a kind-hearted person, Jin Xiaodao asked, "Benevolent benefactor, do you think my injuries can be cured?"

The physician examined her and sighed regretfully, "Madam, your eyeballs have been crushed. Even a deity descending from the heavens could not save them. What kind of sharp weapon carved the wounds on your face? They are far too deep. I fear that even if the wounds heal, the scars will be impossible to smooth out or restore."

Shaking his head, the physician sighed, "Even if my master, Zhuge Gaoshan, were here now, he could only manage to fade the scars on your face. There is simply nothing that can be done for your eyes." Jin Xiaodao lay there in despair, unwilling to speak another word. Leaving aside how she was to live from now on, even her daughter's whereabouts were unknown. For the first time in her life, Jin Xiaodao wished to die; with death, all her troubles would be over. Yet her daughter was still alive, so she had to live. She had to find her daughter, Long Nianze; at only five years old, the child could not possibly survive alone. She had to find her husband, Long Ye. Even if he did not love her, he was the only one who could help her.

The physician of Huairentang tended to Jin Xiaodao's wounds and then prepared to remove her crushed eyeballs. Jin Xiaodao nervously grasped the physician's wrist and asked, "If you remove my eyeballs, won't that leave two huge holes in my face?" The physician replied helplessly, "If we do not remove them, the wounds are likely to rot, and the situation will quickly spiral out of control." Jin Xiaodao shook her head desperately, "No, I would rather have scars than leave two horrifying hollows on my face."

With no other choice, the physician could only treat the bleeding, trim away the excess flesh, stitch the wounds simply, and wrap them in fine, soft gauze. Jin Xiaodao was anxious to leave; she had to go out as soon as possible to find her daughter. She felt that being even a step too late could cause her daughter to perish for no reason.

The physician of Huairentang had his apprentice fetch a bamboo stick for Jin Xiaodao. Blind and leaning on the bamboo stick, Jin Xiaodao did not know where to go. Just like Long Ye searching without direction for nine years after losing Meng Xiaoli, Jin Xiaodao too embarked upon the path of searching for her husband and daughter.

The sun shone brightly in a clear blue sky dotted with white clouds. It was the season when hundreds of flowers vied for beauty and bees and butterflies fluttered in swarms. At the border between Xiaoyao Mountain and Wangyou Mountain on Solitary Isle, there was a clear river. Meng Xiaoli had previously ordered people to pave a bathing pool nearby with blue flagstones, channeling water from upstream into it, with the water from the pool flowing smoothly back into the river. During leisure times, Meng Xiaoli and her disciples would bathe outdoors here, naming it the "Roaming Pool."

Seeing that the weather was suitable and the scenery pleasant, Meng Xiaoli brought the performer Li Yaorao and a group of other disciples to the Roaming Pool to bathe. The sunlight was exceptionally warm, and the water in the pool was gentle and comforting. Meng Xiaoli lay back in the Roaming Pool, her head resting against the smooth round stone at the edge, watching the scenery and the group of female disciples frolicking and making a ruckus on the shore, thoroughly enjoying herself.

The performer Li Yaorao swam over with a smile, pressed close to Meng Xiaoli's side, and asked, "Sect Master, shall I massage your back for you?" Meng Xiaoli turned over, resting her arms crossed upon the blue stone with her head resting on her arms, and smiled, "Very well!" Then, Li Yaorao stood in the pool behind Meng Xiaoli, gently massaging her shoulders. Catching sight of the several scars on Meng Xiaoli's shoulders and lower back, she could not help but sigh, "Sect Master, you have been through countless battles. The scars left on your body are all earned with your life, just like the merits of a seasoned military general."

Hearing this, Meng Xiaoli smiled faintly and said, "Countless battles, indeed not. It was merely being bullied by others." Just as she was speaking, she suddenly heard the female disciples behind her cry out in alarm and splash into the water. Meng Xiaoli turned her head to look and saw a group of male slaves squatting behind the trees, peeping. Seeing the scantily clad female disciples cry out, they hurriedly scrambled back into the forest in a panic. A few bold male slaves remained in place, laughing at those who fled.

Meng Xiaoli laughed without the slightest avoidance, "Let them be." The female disciples teased and scolded the male slaves, while a few of the male slaves shouted provocative words from afar.

Luo Yunsu walked over to Meng Xiaoli carrying a plate of fruit, reclined against the edge of the pool, and offered fruit to Meng Xiaoli. Basking in the sunshine, she triumphantly shook her raised feet and waved to greet the male slaves in the distance.

The male slaves in the distance did not dare to draw closer, so they picked up stones from the ground and threw them toward the Roaming Pool. The female disciples picked up the tossed pebbles and threw them back at the male slaves.

A stone battle between the two sides was about to break out. Meng Xiaoli ate her fruit and watched the battle from the side when suddenly a stone flew straight toward the center of her forehead. Struck with pain, Meng Xiaoli lowered her head and covered her forehead. Everyone present turned around, sensing that something terrible was about to happen. Holding their breath and concentrating, they did not even dare to heave a loud sigh. The male slaves' legs trembled; unsure whether to flee or stay, they stood frozen in place, looking anxiously toward Meng Xiaoli. Luo Yunsu, who was in the middle of eating an apple, had her mouth half-open and forgot to chew, looking down in terror at Meng Xiaoli's back. The previously bustling and lively scene instantly plunged into dead silence.

After a long moment, Meng Xiaoli abruptly raised her head, swam forward, snatched the stones from the hands of the female disciples one by one, and hurled them fiercely at the male slaves while scolding playfully, "How dare you smash this Sect Master's head? Do you not know that my head is made of iron?" Seeing this, everyone breathed a massive sigh of relief. The female disciples all crowded around Meng Xiaoli, shouting, "Rest assured, Sect Master, we will help you exact revenge!" With that, they tossed stones one after another, pelting the male slaves. The male slaves laughed heartily as they lowered their heads to sweep the ground, searching for the remaining stones. When the nearby stones were almost all thrown, the timid ones were assigned to scavenge for stones from all around and watch the fun, laughing along heartily.

Caught up in the height of her enjoyment, Performer Li pulled other women with theater backgrounds to stand in an open space and began to sing opera together. The male slaves in the forest not only feasted their eyes to their hearts' content but also enjoyed the singing voice of a renowned performer—it was a blessing accumulated over three lifetimes, not to be traded for a thousand pieces of gold.

While this side was carefree and reveling in joy, Long Ye learned the truth and was overwhelmed with chaos in his mind. He frequently went to Xiudu Temple in the city, dazed and dwelling there for several days. Pondering over and over, he felt that he could not bring himself to kill Jin Xiaodao and the child; after all, everything had been caused by him alone. Although Jin Xiaodao deserved to die, they unfortunately now had a child together. He decided to simply spare her life. As a man and a father, Long Ye felt he must settle the arrangements for them, mother and child, no matter what.

However, when Long Ye returned to the courtyard outside the city, the buildings and houses had all been reduced to ashes, and there was already no sign of Jin Xiaodao and her daughter.

A fresh wave of remorse washed over Long Ye's heart. He figured that Jin Xiaodao must have feared he would take her life, and had fled with the child at some point, disheartened to the point of even burning down the courtyard.

With a heavy and gloomy mind, Long Ye once again returned to his familiar Xiudu Temple. With his inner knots tightly entangled, he prostrated himself before the feet of the golden Buddha. The abbot of the temple walked out from behind the main hall, bowed his head toward Long Ye, offered a greeting, and said, "Patron Long, this humble monk has noticed you lingering here for many days, with your brows tightly furrowed and heaving long sighs. Have you encountered some difficult hardship?"

Long Ye raised his head and returned the greeting, sighing, "Master Huizhi, it is not so much a hardship for this junior, but rather an emotional knot that is difficult to untie."

The monk Huizhi gestured toward the rear hall, signaling, "Then why not ask Patron Long to move to my humble quarters, taste some clear tea, and converse briefly with this humble monk? Perhaps it will help ease your mind." Long Ye lowered his gaze in thought, then nodded, stood up, and said, "Then I shall truly be troubling the Master."

A serene smile forever lingered on Huizhi's face, gentle and warm, making anyone who saw him feel instantly at ease. Long Ye followed Huizhi to his room. Huizhi fetched a kettle to brew tea, and sat cross-legged opposite Long Ye.

Huizhi poured a cup of hot tea and pushed it before Long Ye. Long Ye received it with both hands, feeling deeply grateful. Huizhi initiated the conversation, "Is Patron Long's emotional knot tied to matters of the heart?" Raising his eyes toward Huizhi, Long Ye asked in astonishment, "How did Master Huizhi know that this junior is trapped by romance?"

Huizhi smiled faintly and said, "All things in this world, no matter how difficult, can eventually be unraveled, except for the word 'love,' which is the hardest to untie. Power makes people arrogant, wealth makes people confused, and desire makes people restless. All of Patron Long's troubles are written plainly upon your face." With that, Huizhi picked up the teapot and refilled Long Ye's cup with hot tea.

Lowering his head, Long Ye sighed, "My wife and I were childhood sweethearts who grew up together. She was gentle, generous, kind, and accommodating—the most wonderful existence in this world. Sometimes she said I loved her perhaps because I had never encountered any other women from childhood onward." Here, Long Ye smiled, shook his head, and continued to sigh, "What does it matter if I have seen other women? Loving her made me feel that no other woman in this world could compare to even a fraction of her. Although another woman was introduced between us, my love for her never wavered all these years. It was my momentary foolishness that led to a mistake; I failed to place complete trust in her, chilling her heart, and she left me without looking back."

Huizhi sighed, "When a woman's heart has been chilled through, warming it back up is no easy task!"

With his head bowed in depression, Long Ye said, "I suppose I simply never understood women. A fragile, petite, and kind girl whose pair of eyes were as pure as jade without a speck of impurity could turn vicious and cruel overnight, taking a child's life casually while chatting and laughing as if nothing were the matter, and her only reason was simply because she loved me. I misplaced my trust in another woman and harmed my wife without even realizing it. She left me for nine years, and I spent nine years searching for her, all the while feeling grateful for the companionship of the very person who killed my child, even self-reproaching over whether it was too cruel for her to live such a precarious life with me. After searching for my wife for four or five years without knowing whether she was still alive, I was physically and emotionally exhausted, and out of weakness, I married the murderer of my child. Yet ever since, I have lived in deep remorse. When her child was born, I failed to fulfill a father's responsibilities to the slightest degree, single-mindedly searching for my wife instead. The mother and child drifted everywhere with me, never experiencing a single day of settled life. Finally, I received news of my wife, settled the mother and child, and went to confirm the lead. When I saw her again, apart from love, only guilt remained. I do not know how she managed to survive all these years; I truly want to embrace her, but I suddenly realize that I no longer have the qualification, and I am no longer worthy to possess her."

Huizhi nodded sympathetically and advised, "The past mistake is already made and is difficult to make amends for. The young child is innocent; you ought to nurture and raise them with care."

Supporting his forehead with a painful expression on his face, Long Ye shook his head and said, "That woman feared I would kill her, so she has already left with the child, and her whereabouts are completely unknown."

Huizhi asked, "There are two roads, one leading north and one leading south, and on one of those roads is a person—either your wife or your child. You have lingered at this crossroads for several days; do you have an answer in your heart?"

Grasping his head with both hands, Long Ye stared at the tea on the table, the water within the cup having already gone cold. He said desolately, "A man must not make mistakes. Once a mistake is made, it becomes a monstrous blunder that can never be mended no matter what. Neither of the two roads is mine to choose. I have ruined the lives of two women, so I might as well let them go; perhaps they will live better lives that way."

A single pear blossom petal drifted weightlessly through the window and landed inside Long Ye's teacup. Gently picking up the pear blossom petal between his fingers, Long Ye placed it in the palm of his hand and extended it out the window. A gentle breeze carried the pear blossom petal away into mid-air. Watching the direction in which the pear blossom departed, Long Ye drained the remaining tea in a single gulp.