057 My Trump Card

I have always known how ruthless the Heartless are; their bodies seem completely numb to pain, and their strength is in no way inferior to Chen Hao’s. One must know that Chen Hao’s Square 2 ability is practically superhuman strength, though in my eyes, there is still a gap between him and the Heartless.

If Chen Hao had more time, perhaps his raw power could surpass the Heartless, but right now he is still far behind.

Moreover, this Heartless is clearly different from the ones I’d encountered before in the bathhouse or the dormitory; it is utterly unfazed by my light attacks.

The Heartless’ main means of offense lies in their razor-sharp teeth, capable of tearing open a foe’s throat, and in their monstrous strength. Faced with a creature that feels no pain, I can’t think of any solution except to run.

Feeling the Heartless’ murderous intent drawing ever closer, I noticed the Nightmare had stopped its attacks, looking on with amusement.

That fiend wants to sit back and watch the clash, waiting to reap the benefits as a bystander.

But if I were to relax my guard against the Heartless, the Nightmare might seize the opportunity to strike me down. If I turned my back on the Heartless, it could deal me a lethal blow. Neither side could afford to drop their vigilance. As I watched the Heartless closing in, a sense of helplessness welled up from deep inside me.

Why am I even fighting?

I was just a carefree university student—why do I have to be caught up in this senseless conflict? Is this the consequence of drinking too much, or the punishment for returning to the dorm too late? If so, my luck is truly wretched.

My classmates keep dying around me, and those who survive can hardly open their hearts as freely as before. Sun Cheng, who left our little group; Pang Dongqiang, Wu Mingran, and Li Yuan, who formed their own factions. My good brother Tan Tou, because of me, fell into the path of slaughter, his mind consumed by bloodlust. Lin Wan is still sunk in despair, unable to escape the shadow of Lu Ling’s death. Zhang Yisheng and Su Mu’s dark, twisted sides are surfacing as the ordeals grow harder.

I once thought Zhang Yisheng was just a cold, aloof type, never imagining that deep down he could be so ruthless.

To preserve his own life, he could cast aside the lives of others without a second thought.

But, at least there’s one person who has never changed, the only one who has always treated me the same, no matter how much bloodshed we’ve endured.

Han Xue.

Thinking of Han Xue, I found myself smiling involuntarily. How long would this foolish girl survive without me?

Perhaps, if I die by the Nightmare’s hands, she’ll be next.

If that’s the case, what’s the point of fighting so hard until now?

I once thought I could be a savior, living for the sake of saving everyone. I rallied the others to resist together, to find ways for as many as possible to survive, but each attempt ended in failure, always with the survival of some bought by the sacrifice of others.

Though the number who made it wasn’t small, this was never the outcome I wanted.

How many people have died because of me, how many by my own hand? I can hardly bear to look at my own hands anymore.

I used to lie to myself—telling myself that it was right to kill, because by killing them, I could survive and save the majority; this was the result everyone wanted.

I thought I was different from Zhang Yisheng and Su Mu.

I thought I was a good person.

In truth, I am just another hypocrite.

On the surface, I urge everyone to fight to live together, but when the numbers exceed the limit, I secretly hope someone dies to ensure the survival of the majority. Even if I’m not the one to carry it out, that thought has always lurked in my mind, never fading.

And then there’s Wen Lingyu—before, to hide my abilities, I led her into a dangerous situation, and in the end she lost her body.

To put it plainly, I’m simply afraid of dying. I view death as something terrifying.

Whenever someone around me dies, I pretend not to care, but when I see the longing in their eyes and the agony contorting their faces, my heart trembles—trembles with fear.

I’m afraid of death, so I don’t want to die.

That’s why I long to become stronger, why I act with others in groups—so I can be protected, so my odds of survival are maximized. That was my true reason for forming alliances.

But in this nightmare world, I am alone, utterly isolated.

---

All the alliances I painstakingly built are useless here—no one can save me but myself.

In previous fights, I always had Lin Wan or Tan Tou and the others charge first, while I hid in the back, launching sneak attacks.

Minimal danger, maximum safety. But now, I must face both the Nightmare and the Heartless alone.

I can’t afford to be a coward anymore, can’t hide behind others.

If I don’t fight, I’ll die! And there are still people who need my protection!

“Han Xue, I never told you this.”

“I really like you.”

I took out the jade pendant I always carried. “I’ve always wanted to give this to you...”

Clutching the Two of Spades, I unleashed a surge of blinding light, a massive bronze mirror appearing in phantom behind me.

“Hey!”

The Nightmare in the sky lost patience. Only then did I realize the Heartless had stopped a few meters behind me, not moving any closer. Apparently, it was waiting for the fight between me and the Nightmare to end.

So it does have brains—it wants to finish me off with minimal effort.

The Nightmare frowned, conjuring a fireball in its hand and hurling it at the Heartless.

The Heartless simply raised an arm and smashed the fireball to powder.

“Tch.”

The Nightmare snorted derisively and conjured several ice shards.

“So I still have to do it myself!”

The number of ice shards in the sky grew, a storm of ice about to descend. I waited for the instant the Nightmare launched its attack.

“Go!”

All my light compressed into a small sphere and shot straight at the Nightmare’s face.

“Blazing Light Orb!”

“Ice Rain!”

The Nightmare and I unleashed our abilities at the same time! The light orb exploded the moment it struck the Nightmare, its brilliance illuminating the world.

At that instant, the Nightmare’s conjured ice rain blasted down from the heavens.

The effort of using my trump card sent another wave of dizziness crashing through my mind. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw the Heartless move—three strides and it was behind me, landing a heavy blow to my waist. My body shot into the air like a severed kite string.

I was about to collide with the Nightmare’s ice storm. Time seemed to slow to a crawl.

I saw the Nightmare, gravely injured by my light orb, fleeing into the distance. The nearest ice spike was barely half a meter from my head—if it hit, my skull would be smashed to pieces. On the ground, the Heartless looked up at my flying body, wearing a strange expression. Was that a smile?

Its lips curled, revealing two rows of inverted triangular fangs, and it uttered some unintelligible sound.

Time felt especially slow in that moment. It seemed as if I’d been suspended in air for over ten seconds. Then, I heard a familiar voice.

“Zijian, come back with me.”

“Lin Wan?”

---

Startled, I noticed a strange fissure appear beside me. A hand shot out from within and yanked me inside.

Suddenly, my whole body was falling, and I crashed onto a bed.

When I woke again, the first person I saw was Lin Wan, then Chen Hao.

And...

“Sun Cheng?”

Sun Cheng just grunted and left the dorm room.

“Lin Wan, what on earth happened?” I looked at her in confusion, because I knew the voice that had saved me at the crucial moment was hers.

“Zijian, just rest. You still have injuries,” Lin Wan said gently.

Only then did I notice the stinging pain in my leg. Pulling back the blanket, I found several small cuts, as if slashed by something sharp. Could it have been the Nightmare?

So the Nightmare’s attacks in the dream can affect reality, but there was no bruising on my back—apparently, the Heartless’s attacks don’t carry over into the real world.

“Chen Hao noticed something was wrong with you, so I rushed over,” Lin Wan explained.

“I ran into Sun Cheng on the way and brought him along.”

“It was Sun Cheng who actually saved you.”

Lin Wan sat on the bed, patiently clarifying, “Sun Cheng’s ability is Schrödinger’s Cat—he’s an entity of uncertainty.”

“Dreams are uncertain too, so Sun Cheng can travel between dreams and reality.”

“He was the one who pulled you out just now!”

Watching Sun Cheng’s retreating figure, my heart felt heavy.

In the end, Wu Ziwei also died before my eyes. The bystander bears some responsibility as well.

“Sun Cheng...”

The rift between us isn’t something that can be resolved overnight, but this time I truly owe him.

“Zijian, you ought to thank me too!” Chen Hao, that big oaf, called out from under the bed. “If I hadn’t noticed you moaning and groaning and not waking up no matter how hard I shook you, you’d still be unconscious now.”

“Give it a rest!” Lin Wan cut Chen Hao off before he could go on, turning away with a laugh. “Weren’t you so scared that you nearly wet yourself when you saw the mysterious wounds on Zijian’s body?”

“All right, enough arguing.” I pretended to be annoyed. Though I’d escaped this time, the Nightmare’s attack still left me shaken.

Letting my guard down, I glanced out the window.

That familiar face, with its inverted triangular fangs, was pressed right up against the glass.